Ye Ol' Backyard

I am a realist; my backyard is a small boring rectangle.

(not my actual backyard, but very similar)

There, I said it.  The grass is sparse and the dirt is dry.  I try to avoid being back there for long periods of time.  As such, I have been thinking about what I could do to change my backyard into a real 'spruce goose'.  (see fig. 1 below)

fig. 1

One idea I have been toying with is installing a nice, large, above-ground pool.  It might take up most of the space I have back there, but (more importantly) this would allow me to actually enjoy my backyard.  I figure I could grab one at Target for around $700, but after weighing the TCO (total cost of ownership) against RCM (rising cost margins) I came up with a diagram I used to help me make an educated decision.  (see fig.2 below)

fig. 2

Jealous?  Well I think from the picture above it's fairly obvious how awesome this idea is.  During the summer I could float in my pool and stare at the blue sky....   a large puffy cloud floats gently along and says hello to me....    my mind a quiet passenger, traveling peacefully on the relaxing cruiseline of fresh air and bliss.  A light breeze...  free nature's warm breath, breathing down my soul, blowing my mind, as my body basks in the heavy warmth of the sun, mercilessly beating away my worries.

But where was I?  Oh yes, so I figured if I install this pool, then I ought to get some trees back there too to give the backyard some warmth.  Maybe some trees around the perimeter of the yard.  And this way when I am floating in my pool I can look up and view some trees in my peripheral vision... instead of my flimsey, untreated, sadly decaying grey fence.  

What type of trees to get?  I came upon a nice website that provides help in selecting a tree that will do well in your climate.  (You can actually enter the county you live in too.)  You can see it here:  tree selector.  Right now I am torn between about 10 different trees.  I have a mesquite tree in my front yard, but I hate raking up all those seed pods it drops during the summer.  Most importantly, however, I want a tree that will not attract bees or wasps.  Yes, I am deathly afraid of them.  No, I'm not going to get over my phobia, so don't even bother trying to convince me how "they won't hurt you if you don't hurt them" or "they are more afraid of you than you are of them".  Blah blah blah.

So I am looking at trees that do NOT have flowery, fragrant blossoms.  And probably not a fruit tree either, because I bet the bees and wasps would love to eat some delicious peaches.  Here are the trees I am looking at:

• Prairie Flameleaf
  
• Texas Ash
• Possumhaw Holly
• Netleaf Hackberry
• Mexican Oak
• Lacey Oak
• Bigtooth Maple
• Lacebark Elm
• Chinese Pistache

One last tree I am considering (which I did not actually see on this website) is the Italian Cypress.  These are very cool, tall, distinguished-looking trees, and when there is a wind they have a tendency to sway gently about.  Also, since they are so tall and narrow, they probably would not drop tree junk into my pool as much as a normal tree.  The only problem I see is that neighbors might think it is a little weird (or complain to the home owner's association) if I had ten of these trees jutting up from my tiny backyard, like a beacon throughout the entire neighborhood.  (see fig. 3 below)

fig. 3